By: REBECCA B. SINGSON, M.D, FPOGS

Let’s face it! Our teens are having sex. According to the 2002 Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Study by the University of the Philippines Population Institute (UPPI) and the Demographic Research and Development Foundation, twenty-six percent (26%) of our Filipino youth nationwide from ages 15 to 25 admitted to having a pre-marital sex experience. What’s worse is that 38% of our youth are already in a live-in arrangement.

What most young men and women don’t realize is that there are scientific reasons why it’s better to preserve your virginity. Unless you’re completely sure that the benefits far outweigh the risks in getting intimate with your special someone, it’s cool to stay a virgin because:

1) YOU MINIMIZE YOUR RISKS FOR ACQUIRING CERVICAL CANCER

The Human Papillomavirus (HPV) is a sexually-transmitted, wart-forming virus that has been implicated in causing cancer of the cervix. This is the most common cancer in women secondary to breast cancer. Women who are at increased risk for acquiring this are those who engage in sex before 18, have a pregnancy at or younger than 18, or have had at least 5 sexual partners, or have had a partner with at least 5 sexual partners. If you start sex at an early age, you have a higher likelihood of going through several sexual partners before you settle down, thus increasing your exposure to acquiring the virus and acquiring cervical cancer. The men can get genital warts from this virus and can certainly pass it on to their partners, thus increasing her risk for cervical cancer. Is that something you would want to gift to your wife with on your honeymoon? There is a way to test women (HPV Digene test) but no test for the man so you can’t know if you have it. Using the condom does not confer protection against acquiring this virus since the condom cannot cover the testes where the warts can grow and proliferate.

2) YOU MINIMIZE YOUR RISK FOR UNWANTED PREGNANCIES

The 1998 National Demographic and Health Survey (NDHS) reveals that 3.6 million of our teenagers (that’s a whopping 5.2% of our population!) got pregnant. In 92% of these teens, the pregnancy was unplanned, and the majority 78% did not even use contraceptives the first time they had sex. Many of the youth are clueless that even on a single intercourse, they could wind up pregnant.

3) YOU MINIMIZE YOUR RISK FOR FETAL DEATHS

The youth should know that the statistics of the Department of Health (DOH) show that fetal deaths are more likely to happen to young mothers, and that babies born by them are likely to have low birth weight. Those are not the likely circumstances you would like to start your family with.

4) YOU MINIMIZE YOUR POSSIBILITY FOR AN ABORTION

Abortion is illegal in the Philippines yet our rate of abortion here is 25 abortions per 1000 women. It would shock you to know that we even have a higher abortion rate compared to the U.S. where abortion is legal at a rate of 23/1000 women. Unplanned pregnancies lead to abortions. In our country, backdoor abortions are resorted to with untrained “hilots” with questionable sterility procedures, increasing the possibility for tetanus poisoning and other complications.

5) YOU MINIMIZE YOUR RISK FOR ACQUIRING SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES

Research shows that boys practice more casual sex or have multiple sex partners and are having sex with commercial sex workers. Once infected, they are likely to be agents in spreading sexually transmitted disease (STD). In general, sex among adolescents is unprotected. Ninety percent (90%) of sexual encounters of males are unprotected. Even their sexual encounters with commercial sex workers are also unprotected (78%). It is essential to realize that according to the Center for Disease Control in the U.S (CDC), three fourths of the women and half of the men infected with Chlamydia have no symptoms at all. Majority of men and women infected with gonorrhea have no symptoms either. And if you think that using the condom gives keeps you safe from STDs. You’re wrong! The condom can protect you from gonorrhea and AIDS but cannot completely protect you from acquiring Chlamydia, herpes and the human papillomavirus, syphilis, and chancroid. The surest way to avoid transmission of sexually transmitted diseases is to abstain from sexual intercourse, or to be in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship with a partner who has been tested and you know is uninfected.

6) YOU DON’T RUN THE RISK OF GETTING PSYCHOLOGICALLY DAMAGED

Once a couple begins to have intercourse, the dynamics of their relationship may change for the better, in terms of increased erotic pleasure and feelings of closeness. However, it may also change for the worse if the woman experiences pain and develops sexual dysfunction which can damage her for life. Feelings about the loss of virginity can be very complex especially in the context of a conservative and orthodox religious background. Men and women who hear stories from their peers may have preconceived notions about how great and pleasurable sex is. When they find out that their own experience is not as they imagined because they experienced less pleasure or are not achieving multiple orgasms, they may end up devaluing sex, their partners, male-female relationships and/or their self esteem may suffer. Even a so called “good” sexual relationship can be detrimental to the process of sexual unfolding because young men may become confused about the meaning of sex in their lives because their early sexual experiences where forced upon them by a more experienced female. They may end up being overwhelmed by their sexual experience, become fearful of female demands and become unsure of the male role in a heterosexual relationship.

7) YOU DON’T RUN THE RISK OF AN EMOTIONAL DISASTER

How many of our youth have lost their scholarship, flunked their exams or worse, become suicidal because they were dumped after having an intense, intimate relationship with someone they gave up their virginity for? There is less at stake when you decide to call it quits if the degree of intimacy has not reached the level of intercourse. It is vital to create a firm idea of who the self is before you can achieve psychosexual maturity. Sexual unfolding is a process that would always be consistent with the emotional maturity. For most, it would require a very gradual experience over many years requiring deliberation, self-discovery and exposure to and creating differential perceptions of other people. In short, collect and collect (friends and suitors) before you select (your mate). Never force the butterfly prematurely out of its cocoon or it will appear with crumpled wings and be crippled to fly for life.

The sexual revolution has ushered in a period in which the average adolescent experiences tremendous pressures to have sexual experience of all kinds. Not only the youth feel pressured but the older virgins also feel apologetic for being a virgin at, let’s say 30 or 40 years old. They suffer from the “virginity burden” syndrome feeling that they are still virgins beyond the “usual” time symbolizing a failure to be appropriately sexual. They equate that to mean that they are not as “normal” or as “free” as other non-virgins so virginity becomes a source of embarrassment.

In this era of AIDS which can lead to death, HPV which can lead to cervical cancer, and unwanted pregnancies, it’s really a cool decision to stay a virgin for all the scientific, psychological and emotional reasons